Tag Archives: coping

Four Things To Remember After A Storm

Four Things To Remember After A Storm

Life is one complicated heap of mess, or so it would seem for some of us who are experiencing overwhelming challenges. As I looked at the many videos on the various social media forums and news websites, I imagined how it is for those who are in the situation. A series of hurricanes including Harvey and Irma have done more destruction than I have ever seen in my time on this earth. My heart grieved for the people in the recent disaster that was Irma, who destroyed the beautiful Caribbean in a few days.

I looked in awe at the pictures of buildings that were completely destroyed passage of hurricane Irma. Most of the photos I have seen so far are from the islands of St. Martin, Barbuda, and the British Virgin Islands; however, I have listened to reports of damage from Anguilla, St. Thomas and a few other Caribbean countries. I have seen flooding in parts of the United States as Irma traveled across the land.

I was not there, but it did not stop the tears and the heartbreak  as I listened to the stories of people and what they did to survive. The sadness I felt as I watched thousands being evacuated from a place they have called home. The fear I felt for those in areas where looting and crime is alleged to have occurred. The concern I felt for those who did not have food to eat. Neither did it stop me from empathizing with persons who were in a state of worry as they tried desperately to get information about their loved ones.

I may not have been in a hurricane like Irma, but the struggle I have been through has been a personal storm of another type. The feelings of despair and hopelessness I had to deal with are like those resulting from any storm. Not to mention the discomfort and not having the resources you need to carry out the activities of daily living. The reality that I had to pick up the pieces and move on is similar to what has happened to those affected by this storm. As the reality of your situation sinks in, I urge you to consider these things:

  1. Your greatest gift is life. As long as you are alive and healthy, everything else is possible. Material things can always be replaced (I know, I had to start all over when I returned home without a job). Give thanks to the Almighty for life always. Amidst all of this destruction, I remain hopeful. Thousands of homes and the countries’ infrastructure are in complete ruins after this hurricane, yet I remain hopeful. For the persons who are very fortunate to have survived a category 5 Hurricane and lived to tell the story, I say to you that there is hope. You have life, which is the most important gift.

Managing Stress After A Hurricane

  1. In times like these, your true strength will be tested. When things are going smoothly in your lives, you might tend to feel strong and positive. However, when things happen and turn your world upside down this is when you need to have those feelings of positivity and hopefulness. In such situations as Irma has created, it is crucial that you change the way you see things. It is not what is happening or has happened to you, but rather how you respond to what is happening or has happened.

How To Rise Above Hopeless Situations

  1. As you struggle to find the meaning of this destruction, I urge you to take one day at a time. The Almighty did not build the world in one day, therefore, you will not meet the level of comfort that you once had in a day. Each day you arise, be thankful for the little you have, while taking small steps to improve the situation. Remember, some people did not make it through the storm. You have life, all else is secondary.

 

4. In all you do be kind to yourself and others. It is easy to become bitter or angry,  but do not be caught up in those feelings of selfishness.  It is okay to grieve about what has happened, however, do not get sucked in by your situation to the point where you are unable to cope.  Instead of grieving by yourself,  find ways of helping out around you.

People unite and help each other are more prosperous than people  who fight against each other. Let those of us who can, help those who are in need at this difficult time.

 

In life, so many things can happen to you, but one thing is sure…how you deal with these challenges will decide the quality of the life you live. It is either you choose to look at your circumstances and complain, or look at what is happening, accept your situation, and decide to take on the challenges before you.

How To Cope With Unmet Expectations

 

How To Cope With Unmet Expectations

Unmet expectations are one of main causes of human sorrow. In fact, everyone I know has had some unmet expectations. Personally, I recall many instances in my life when I became very anxious. In many of these instances, my expectations were high then my feelings of disappointment and pain came crashing down.  In some instances, I cried, became angry, or retreat into my antisocial mood.

In this post, I refer to the past two years and more of my life. For almost three years, I have struggled to find a job. Each place I applied has either not responded or said they will keep my application on file. In all of those instances, I have had only one interview. Now, you would think that this will break anyone, but for me, this has only strengthened my resolve to work harder and constantly sought ways of improving myself.

Similar Posts Hope: The Power of Expectation

It is never easy when you are expecting someone to come through for you and in the end, they do not; if this happens too many times, it is easy for you to become discouraged and lose your faith and trust. Eventually, you have to find a way to cope and as you ponder the issue of unmet expectations, realize that what you expect does not depend solely on what you do. Our expectations mainly depend on what others decide and circumstances outside of us for which we have little or no control…

However, even as difficult as it is to cope with unmet expectations, it is something you will have to learn to deal with because as long as you are a living human being you are going to face disappointments.  Instead of living in fear and thinking that nothing is going to go the way you want in life, the healthier way to cope will be to change your attitude about expectations.

The Silent Marriage Killer In this article the writer gives a unique perspective of how one can cope with expectations in a marriage.

Now, I would never suggest to anyone not to have expectations, because as much as you have been hurt by unfulfilled expectations you cannot totally live without having expectations. Instead, what you should consider doing is go with the flow. Whenever you feel disappointed about something that did not turn out the way you wanted, it is okay if you feel upset for a while then you shake it off. You could consider distracting yourself by thinking well, every disappointment is for the better.

Do I believe that every disappointment is for the better? Yes, I do. Repeatedly, things have worked out perfectly for me after a severe storm in my life. This has given me the ability to cope with anxiety and the other feelings that result from unmet expectations. After so many rejections and unmet expectations, the period for me to bounce back has become narrower.

Therefore, I urge you that the next time your expectations do not come through, as you wanted to, realize that it is not the end of the world. Rather, not having your expectations met is a new opportunity for you to change direction; whether it is in the way you

think or act. Take one day at a time; go with the flow, no hustle.

Do not let the fear of unmet expectations limit you. Be brave, be curious, and have the resilience to move forward~~~~Ophelia Myall

Three Mistakes To Avoid During Times Of Adversity

 Three Mistakes To Avoid During Times Of Adversity

 

How do you deal with stress, challenges, or adversity?  There is no way we would and could go through life without experiencing adversity. So what do we do? Do we run each time we encounter a difficulty?  Alternatively, do we find a way to cope and to do so positively? Whether the source of our stress results from a relationship, work, social, or environmental issue, life is going to throw us challenges.

Five Things To Consider When Facing Life’s Challenges

Some of the challenges we encounter would be small, whereas some would be of a nature that threaten to overwhelm us and sap the energy out of us. When adversity comes knocking, we need to hold on to a few beliefs that will help sustain us through the process. In this post, I discuss some of the mistakes that people make when experiencing adversity. If you do not feel like reading you can always listen to the video  below for some valuable tips on dealing with adversity.

 

  1. Trying to Control The Issue

I think by now every adult, with soundness of mind, know that we are not always able to control what happens to us. Sometimes we create our own storms, and sometimes, things happen when someone outside of us failed to take responsibility.

Regardless of the cause of your situation, there is no point trying to control a situation that has gone beyond your control. You will find that the more you fight with the problem is the more pain it causes.

When things are not the way you want, you should be able to decide if it is worth fighting for, holding on, or letting go. I say, if you have done all in your power and the situation has not changed for the better, it is time to try something new. Sometimes, the something new is taking time to reflect, giving the problem a break, or seeking an alternative where possible.

Here’s a beautiful ariticle that suggests ways in whcih you can overcome adversities.

If you cannot change your environment, you can change the way you view adversity. In addition, as you change the way you look at adversity, you will find new ways of dealing with your situation.

 

  1. Looking at Your Life Based on Your Current Circumstances

Yeah, I know everything seem hopeless right now. You are looking at your circumstances and there seems to be no end in sight. You may have been in the situation for months or even years and nothing seemed to have changed.

Think of your situation as a cloudy sky. Imagine that you woke up one morning to find it was raining and the sky covered with clouds. Nevertheless, as you go through the day, the rain stops and the cloud passes to reveal a beautiful blue sky… this is how life is. This is how your circumstances operate. If you keep the faith long enough and do what you know in our heart to be right, you will make it through whatever adversity you are facing. Moreover, you will grow through your situation.

Is there something in your life that is causing you discomfort? Is there something in your life you know you need to change? Do not wait for things to magically change, instead create a vision of what you want your life to be like and work towards that vision. Always remember, you are more than your circumstances and once you change your mindset, your circumstances will change.

  1. Letting Your Circumstances Dictate How You Treat Others

Sometimes, if we are not careful, periods of adversity can cause us to become bitter. However, you must always be cognizant that there is no room for bitterness if you want a fulfilling life. Besides, bitterness  only adds to your already challenging situation, if you let those feelings consume you.

I have found that whenever I am facing adversity it brings me more peace when I extend a helping hand to someone less fortunate. Always remember, that there are people who are in situations far worse. Today I challenge you to keep your heart soft and in a good place. Practice helping others through your pain. When you focus on helping others, you have less time to dwell on your circumstances. In addition, there is much joy to be experienced from making someone else’s day than sitting at home in the victim mode.

Please share this video to help inspire someone.